第八章、调笑(1)

49.

In his last mail he tells me that one of his classmates will marry to an American. I laugh at him and ask whether he wants to find an American girl now. If he begs me, I would like to be the match-person for him (the so-called poor match boy) and find a blonde girl for him. I can hear that he is grinding his teeth when he read it, so I beg him not bite me, but kiss me instead. As he knows I love him so much, I would like to lose myself rather than losing him. But I really wish he is a girl sometimes, then we can marry legally and he can go to USA with the identification of my spouse.

I really do not know he goes to the net bar to send e-mails to me, I never went there when I was in China, so I do not know the exact price of it, maybe 2.5-5 Yuan per hour, then every month he would have to spend 75-150 Yuan on it. I do not know how much he can earn by giving lessons to his students. I do not think it will be that much, because I ever give lessons too. Certainly he can get some stipend from school as the graduate student, which is a small amount of 215 Yuan as I used to get in the past. So now I come to a terrible conclusion he spends the money that should be used on food to send mails to me. How terrible it is! I would like that he could bite me now, I will use the meat on my body to satiate him. I really do not wish him spend "so much" money just on sending me an email without the regarding of his health. Although spiritual rejoice is essential, physical health is of the same importance too. I am not so strong now, but I go to gym every week, practicing and playing basketball, so I think when we meet I will be stronger. Although I ever tell him that I never fight with others since I went to high school, but I never promise him that I will not beat him in future, especially when he is drunken, then maybe he will regret that he does not eat so many chicken legs and practice freuqently. But that's too late to regret by then, I am cruel sometimes and Moscow does not believe in tears. Ha, I have seen his crying face now, which is really funny. I think he is a little scared, and feels I am not as well as he thinks. That is my aim, as the proverb says: "if the boy is not a little evil, no girl will love him." So I want to become a bit evil every day, but of course I know how to control myself, I will not become a monster in future.


50.

The next day he declares that it seems he is really a poor match-boy struggling on the basic living conditions in my eyes, that's terrible. In fact, situations are not that worse as I assumed. The subsidiary money he can get from our lovely motherland is about 213 Yuan per month, and he can earn nearly 500 Yuan as a teacher, so the total incomes amount to 700 Yuan or so. Of course he can get some unexpected coins from the assistant job of his department. He considers himself as a RICH boy now. The fee of the net bar is just 2 Yuan an hour, and he just surfs on net 1 hour each day. He thinks that I should have a general impression of his economy when I count these numbers with both my fingers and toes. As he ever told me, going to net is his daily habit. He asks me whether I can afford him a place to live when he crawl through the net line to America, with the precondition that I could not shut down my computer before he can reach here, of course there should no virus-detector on my pc too, because he does not want to be killed by it.
　
I ever tell him that my skin is kind of black, he things that is well, people with that kind of skin looks healthy, giving the others the imagination of strong body, and an attractive image. Now he finds his weight is rising, that's terrible, he hates it. But it's fortunate only in winter does this happen. We all know the climate in Beijing, which is hot enough to boil people in summer. To him, it's a good season to lose weight. Why? Oh, the reason is simple. He does like fruits and delicious food very much, but how could he provoke a big appetite under such a horrible tempreture? I am very happy to hear that, otherwise on the very day we meet, probably I will pick up a cute piggy at the airport rather than a lovely boy.

In my mails I ever mentioned I maybe beat him when he is drunken, he thinks that's impossible. Because he has a quite good stomach to hold the wine and super-nerve in brain to keep him alert enough to bite me back until I cry for help, then he can stop. That is his famous proverb: "You have your teeth, I have my own either." Of course I know that's only a joke, if you want to know the final contest score, we will try it on the day we meet. But one thing for sure is, modestly speaking, maybe I can't win him on drinking. Last night at dinner, his classmates wanted to introduce a girl to him as his girlfriend. They sang high praise for that girl to indicate she and him were the perfect spouse in future. A girlfriend? Maybe a tiger! No way! Then he tried his best to refuse their kindness. But they stick to their opinion that he should have a pretty girlfriend now. He had to drink more, thanking for them and shifting their topics to other focus.

As to my saying that I will become a bit evil each day until I am a monster at last, he is not afraid of that. He does have his own confidence to tame me back with his warm heart full of love. As for my advice about the frequency of mails, it is up to me. He only tell me that he is very glad to hear my laughter in the mail-box when he read my mails, so he knows I am more optimistic than before now. And he will appreciate that if I do give him a hand and send the GRE books to him. Recently, he will prepare for his final exam, too. It is a piece of cake for a primary student, and he will arrange his plan for future, maybe the beginning study of TOEFL is the first step. The next year will be busy and happy when he lists out all these plans. He thanks me, his lover, who gives him so much energy and strength. And he does wish that the wings, the very wings will grow out from his body, then he could fly to America.


51.

I just finish my final test in that week and I cheat him that I do not feel so well because I do poorly. He should be responsible for it since I can not sleep well these days, and get up early everyday, if I fail the test, then I will be driven back to China. But maybe that is what I wish, I do want to see him now. As to other things, they are not that important to me.

I know he must feel worried about me, just like a poor match boy and want to cry. Although I ever tell him that I do not study hard this term, I perform well in the test. In his last mail I know his economic conditions, so I laugh at him that it is the national secret, how can he tell others freely. He should charge me for knowing it. To make him feel fair, I will tell him my balance sheet. I can get about $17000 each year, What I have to pay is the tax, the rent for the apartment, the food, the insurance fee, the textbooks etc, the amount is about $7000-8000 every year. So I can save about the same money. As we know, the law is difficult to get financial aid, just because so many students want to apply for it, the competition is heated. Therefore I wish in future I could afford part of his tuition fee, especially his first year here. It is not difficult to make a living in USA now, just because the good economic condition since Bill Clinton became the president. The minimum salary is about $8 per hours to be a dishwasher or baby-sitter. Maybe I can go out and find a part-time job during holidays. But I am not so sure now, I do not know whether my supervisor needs me to do experiment or not.

I have to remind him that he should be watchful of the girl who wants to be the match person for him. I am afraid she wants to get him instead of introducing another girl to him. I know the trick very well. Just as I ever mentioned in last email, I plan to introduce a blonde girl to him, but in fact it is myself that want to get him. So I think the God is really fair, I suffer from the punishment immediately. Now I want to receive my joking back, though I know the splashed water is difficult to get back, I am just afraid he can not resist the attack of those long-tongued girl, who is really nuisance, how dare she struggles for my bf, damn it.

Well I think he is right, he should begin from the TOEFL, which is composed of four parts: writing, listening, grammar and reading. Of them, the writing is singled out, which has its own grading scale, varying from 0 to 6. The requirement is about 5 to most school. The common score that others often talk is the combination of the other three, every part is the same importance. The questions appearing in grammar and reading parts are not that difficult, but you should make as few mistakes as possible. Because to each mistake, you will lose more than 10 points in your final grade. To Chinese students, the listening part is the most difficult one, which is divided into three parts too. The first sub-regiment is the short dialogues, whose content is widely, about anything in everyday life; the second and third sub-regiments are short articles or longer dialogues, just like those appeared in CET 6.As we know the best way to prepare for it is by listening to the BBC or other broadcasting programs made by USA or Great Britain. Another form of TOEFL test is the Test of Spoken English (TSE). If a student wants to get teaching assistantship (TA) in future he has to pass it too, the full grade is 60,and most Graduate School require a score of 50 or 55,it is the most difficult one to Chinese students. Even though I have stayed here for about 4 months now, I still can not be sure whether I can pass it. During the holiday and next term I have to spend much time on it, or else I really cannot get the financial aid for the next year. We both need efforts. I tell him that if he thinks it is time for him to prepare for the GRE test he can feel free to tell me his address and then I will ask for my parents to mail some books to him.



(to be continued)